| Mental illness is not my fault or your fault and for that | | | | pretty bleak, tough and has a slight shred of hope with |
| matter there is no liability on anyone for its occurrence. | | | | the advances in medicine and the understanding of |
| It is genetic and being clinical or biological does not | | | | how our total chemistry works in union with hormones, |
| soothe or calm the mind. For me it gave me a | | | | minerals and vitamins. Trial and error is the main |
| temporary respite to know that there was an answer, | | | | approach as we are all so individual and what works |
| but then the truth permeated and settled with an | | | | successfully for me may not work for another client. |
| alarming reality that this is a lifelong treatment plan if it | | | | Patience at this stage is very important, support is |
| is to be abated. | | | | magical and encouragement is like a warm blanket. A |
| There is no cure and as such it is chronic in its | | | | lot has yet to be known and discovered really. But |
| diagnosis and one has to accept that it has to be lived | | | | meanwhile back at the funny farm, life is far from |
| with. Many who suffer and are on a successful | | | | humorous. |
| treatment plan keep it quiet so as not to receive | | | | My life of turmoil began years ago, to be exact I have |
| rejection, name-calling, loss of promotion and maybe | | | | no idea when. Imagine you are in a dark cave and all |
| even loss of a job. Mental illness successfully managed | | | | the passages stemming to and fro are equally dark. |
| gives a new lease of life to the patient and many go | | | | Occasionally there is a wee bit of reprieve when a |
| on to succeed in areas beyond their wildest dreams. | | | | glimmer of sunlight peeks through and as I creep closer |
| Many times doing better than the so-called 'normal | | | | it vanishes and therefore I retreat deeper into my |
| people'. A word that has yet to be given a satisfactory | | | | cave. |
| explanation, for me anyway it is all relative to the | | | | Now imagine living behind a mask of wonderful |
| mindset of the individual. | | | | appearance and to the entire world ones twinkling |
| To live in the life of one with manic depression is a far | | | | eyes are a reflection of happiness and my enthusiasm |
| cry from the expected way of life of normal thinking. | | | | is a sign that all is well within my framework and I am |
| What follows will give you a brief insight into the | | | | delightful to be around. Sounds great, does it not? It |
| overwhelming darkness that has its own reality. | | | | would if it was true. |
| Escaping reality, what is reality? Reality for me is the | | | | Behind the mask the continuous question remains ever |
| constant ache of helplessness, hopelessness and | | | | present, am I doing all right? Yes everyone is |
| worrying about what is wrong with me? Having a | | | | convinced I am fine and happy as a lark and will leave |
| chronic mental illness is no walk in the park. Compared | | | | me alone. How much further from the truth this picture |
| to tangible diseases or being locked in jail, the intangible | | | | is, as the emptiness is all invasive and tearing me apart. |
| concepts of mental illness make it that much harder to | | | | I used to be able to participate but lately I just want to |
| accept and comprehend as a patient. | | | | be left alone. Not because of the 'why me', or feeling |
| The general public is truly in ignorance about mental | | | | sorry for myself, but because it is easier and less |
| illness and many prefer to remain in that state | | | | traumatic to be alone in my world than wearing the |
| because of 'the unknown'. | | | | mask to be in the other world. |
| For those of us blessed with this ailment the future is | | | | |