| If someone had told me eighteen months ago that I | | | | in my life, I functioned either well or badly. I got |
| would be leading a panic free life, I would have laughed | | | | remarried and started a family, life was good and the |
| in their face. I probably would have worried about it | | | | panics and worries subsided. They still popped up |
| afterwords but then worrying was a big hobby of | | | | occasionally just to remind me that I hadn't completely |
| mine at the time. | | | | defeated them but on the whole they left me alone |
| I know that I am making light of a serious subject but I | | | | most of the time. |
| feel that I am entitled to and making light of things, | | | | Then I lost my job. Next we started our own business |
| keeping them in perspective has been a huge part of | | | | and worry and panic came home to roost. I tried |
| my recovery. | | | | counselling. I had medication for depression. I was on |
| Fifteen years ago, I had my first panic attack. With the | | | | beta blockers to try to control the physical side of my |
| benefit of hindsight and a great deal of knowledge | | | | symptoms. I even had a course of cognitive |
| gleaned over the last few years it should not have | | | | behavioural therapy to try and work through the panics |
| come as any surprise. I had a great deal of underlying | | | | and control them. I carried various natural remedies |
| stress in my life at the time. My wife had left me, the | | | | with me, ready to put three drops on my tongue at the |
| house had been sold and all this happened just after I | | | | first sign of a panic. |
| started a new job in sales management. | | | | Nothing worked. Lots of things seemed to help with |
| On the day in question I was having a meeting with | | | | the symptoms but nothing seemed to tackle the root |
| one of my team who had been proving to be | | | | cause. |
| particularly troublesome. I had prepared well for the | | | | There are two things that you need to accept if you |
| meeting. This sort of meeting was fairly routine and | | | | are to overcome anxiety and panic attacks. |
| held no fears for me. The meeting proved to be | | | | One is that the anxiety comes from within you and is |
| difficult but still should not have caused me any | | | | seldom based on fact. Most of your worries will be |
| problems. | | | | you thinking through a series of worst case scenarios |
| In the middle of our conversation my heart just started | | | | that in reality are unlikely to ever come true. |
| jumping about in my chest. It was like it had skipped a | | | | The second is that worry alone cannot hurt you. It is a |
| beat or two. I now know that I was experiencing | | | | trick of the mind. Look back on all your worries, |
| palpitations but at the time I was terrified. I broke out in | | | | anxieties and panic attacks and try to find one that did |
| a cold sweat, I felt sick. It was frightening. The meeting | | | | you any harm. |
| came to an abrupt end as I had no option but to walk | | | | Once I accepted these two facts my confidence |
| out of the room feeling as if I was going to collapse. | | | | started to return. Gradually I returned to a normal life. |
| I left work early and went to the doctor who | | | | Yes I still worry. Worry is probably not the right word. I |
| diagnosed an anxiety disorder and my first panic | | | | am in a recession, running my own business and I |
| attack. | | | | have, let's say, some concerns. |
| For the next fourteen years I struggled with anxiety | | | | The difference is that they don't keep me awake at |
| and panic attacks. Depending on what was happening | | | | night and I keep them in perspective. |